Africans In China

Recement, quand j’ai lance mon blog, j’ai ecrit que mes articles seront exclusivement en Anglais (ou Kirundi si ma Maman le demande). Raison evoquee : mon ordi a un clavier anglais.

Je viens de changer d’avis (pas d’ordi). Je vais aussi ecrire en francais car j’ai vu que pour donner mon avis sur differents articles qui se trouvent sur les sites burundais, il est imperatif d’utiliser le francais.

Dans les articles a venir alors, attendez-vous au francais.

Ir.Daniel

A CHRISTIAN DEMOCRAT: You have two cows. You keep one and give one to your neighbor.

A SOCIALIST: You have two cows. The government takes one and gives it to your neighbor.

AN AMERICAN REPUBLICAN: You have two cows. Your neighbor has none. So what?

AN AMERICAN DEMOCRAT: You have two cows. Your neighbor has none. You feel guilty for being successful. You vote people into office who tax your cows, forcing you to sell one to raise money to pay the tax. The people you voted for then take the tax money and buy a cow and give it to your neighbor. You feel righteous.

A COMMUNIST: You have two cows. The government seizes both and provides you with milk.

A FASCIST: You have two cows. The government seizes both and sells you the milk. You join the underground and start a campaign of sabotage.

DEMOCRACY, AMERICAN STYLE: You have two cows. The government taxes you to the point you have to sell both to support a man in a foreign country who has only one cow, which was a gift from your government.

CAPITALISM, AMERICAN STYLE: You have two cows. You sell one, buy a bull, and build a herd of cows.

BUREAUCRACY, AMERICAN STYLE: You have two cows. The government takes them both, shoots one, milks the other, pays you for the milk, then pours the milk down the drain.

AN AMERICAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. You are surprised when the cow drops dead.

A FRENCH CORPORATION: You have two cows. You go on strike because you want three cows.

A JAPANESE CORPORATION: You have two cows. You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. You then create clever cow cartoon images called Cowkimon and market them World-Wide.

A GERMAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You reengineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves.

A BRITISH CORPORATION: You have two cows. They are mad. They die. Pass the shepherd’s pie, please.

AN ITALIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows, but you don’t know where they are. You break for lunch.

A RUSSIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You count them and learn you have five cows. You count them again and learn you have 42 cows. You count them again and learn you have 12 cows. You stop counting cows and open another bottle of vodka.

A SWISS CORPORATION: You have 5000 cows, none of which belong to you. You charge others for storing them.

A BRAZILIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You enter into a partnership with an American corporation. Soon you have 1000 cows and the American corporation declares bankruptcy.

AN INDIAN CORPORATION: You have two cows. You worship both of them.

A CHINESE CORPORATION: You have two cows. You have 300 people milking them. You claim full employment, high bovine productivity, and arrest the newsman who reported on them.

AN ISRAELI CORPORATION: There are these two Jewish cows, right? They open a milk factory, an ice cream store, and then sell the movie rights. They send their calves to Harvard to become doctors. So, who needs people?

AN ARKANSAS CORPORATION: You have two cows. That one on the left is kinda cute.

A little boy goes to his dad and asks, “What is politics?”

Dad says, “Well son, let me try to explain it this way: I’m the breadwinner of the family, so let’s call me capitalism. Your Mom, she’s the administrator of the money, so we’ll call her the Government. We’re here to take care of your needs, so we’ll call you the people. The nanny, we’ll consider her the Working Class. And your baby brother, we’ll call him the Future. Now, think about that and see if that makes sense,”

So the little boy goes off to bed thinking about what dad had said.

Later that night, he hears his baby brother crying, so he gets up to check on him. He finds that the baby has severely soiled his diaper. So the little boy goes to his parents’ room and finds his mother sound asleep. Not wanting to wake her, he goes to the nanny’s room. Finding the door locked, he peeks in the keyhole and sees his father in bed with the nanny. He gives up and goes back to bed. The next morning, the little boy says to his father, “Dad, I think I understand the concept of politics now.”

The father says, “Good son, tell me in your own words what you think politics is all about.”

The little boy replies, “Well, while Capitalism is screwing the Working Class, the Government is sound asleep, the People are being ignored and the Future is in deep poo.”

At the height of a political corruption trial, the prosecuting attorney attacked
a witness.

“Isn’t it true,” he bellowed, “that you accepted five thousand dollars to compromise this case?”

The witness stared out the window as though he hadn’t heard the question.

“Isn’t it true that you accepted five thousand dollars to compromise this case?” the lawyer repeated.

The witness still did not respond.

Finally, the judge leaned over and said, “Sir, please answer the question.”

“Oh,” the startled witness said, “I thought he was talking to you.”

It’s Sunday the end of the week.  I m going back to work tomorrow. I had a good time with the Philipino’s choir at Saint Peters Church.  I will add pictures as soon as I buy a camera.

Thanks to  Philbert, Ildephonse, Mingli and Blaise for the visit, we had a good time. See you next week-end . It’s time to sleep see u tomorrow .

Daniel

Congratulations to Mingli Ndabaneze and Philbert Nduwimfura who have been graduated the former in Mechanical engineering (Dong hua University)and the later in Computer Science and Technology (Shanghai University). Zhen de bu rong yi!!!!!!!!!!!! (bit of chinese).

They are now members of burundian engineers ; a privilege not granted to many in that small beautiful mountainous country of east Africa : Burundi bwa Nyaburunga.Congratulations again.

The party was wonderful and the joy could be read on the face of Mingli’s mom. But sorry I had no camera with me. U will need to wait if u want some pictures. I promise I m going to buy one very soon, I saw that I missed a good opportunity to take pictures.

Most of us continued the party at Dong xing Road night club where we continued enjoying the beer and wine and of course a nice conversation about whatever came in minds.

One of the interesting topics was about the injustice in burundian Chinese government scholarship students, some enjoying a scholarship sponsorship (complement de bourse ) from the ministry of education in Burundi and others not. More on that will come very soon.

Congratulations again to Mingli and Philbert.

Hello from Daniel

Thanks God, I have finally decided to lunch this blog. After years of hesitations.

This blog which is officially lunched today (5th July 2008 ) will be a place where I will be sharing every moment I m spending on this planet with you and the generations to come. I’ve had wonderful moments with friends or alone with my computer or in that adoration room at Saint Peters Church room 111. However, I’ve been keeping all of it in myself and now can’t take the risk of exploding with it any more. I’ve decided to share it with u guys.

My blog will be in English and some Kirundi maybe in case my mom would ask. No French please. I have an English key board and after six years far from french accents, writing french with my english keyboard is a nightnmare and I m not going to complicate my life because of that.

I don t also care of my english syntax, as long as u can understand what I write, it’s ok for me. This blog is not a good reference for those who want to improve their english.

My articles will be covering my daily life and my opinions about what I see here and there.

Thanks and many thanks for reading my blog